Posted by lindes on November 02, 2003 at 00:47:01:
In Reply to: It just happens posted by New Mom on September 25, 2003 at 06:09:20:
You weren't the "female" before?
Things SHOULD change when you have a baby - when a woman gives birth, that human being should become her priority in life. There's no room for selfishness in parenthood, and it's perfectly normal that there will be more responsibilities.
Ideally, BOTH parents should be active participants in parenting, but if a woman stays home full-time, she will naturally be expected to do more at home, to be the primary caregiver. However, if both partners work outside the home, they should share in the housework, BUT . . . because I advocate mothers being home full-time, I have to say that if both partners work outside the home, they really shouldn't have a child until the woman is able and willing to be home as a full-time mother. (And nope, I don't think fathers should be home full-time to raise a child while his "alpha-earner" partner conquers the world of business).
As a feminist with some traditional views, my opinion is that women who want a career outside the home should go for it full-steam. But if a woman wants to have a child, she should be in a solid and stable relationship (married or not) and should be dedicated to staying home full-time. Motherhood is a career, not just a sideline hobby.