The Best of the Mommytrap E-mails

Top 6 messages Sent To MommyTrap.com
since its inception on May 1, 2002, in terms of
humor, relevance, and interest.

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RE. Dating

In addition to potential fertility problems arising from waiting until your later thirties and early forties to settle down and try to have children, some of you expressed the idea that there is a lack of quality men around at that time.

Consider this email sent by Pam, a very successful 37 year-old attorney living in New York City, who would prefer to meet a nice Jewish man but is willing to consider other (religious) possibilities.

1. I think you should do a book about dating -- mine would be called "No Sex in the City." I could easily supply you with much material.

Currently up to bat:
1. Real Estate Guy (owns his own business) -- kicked out of 3 prep schools, dropped out of college, formerly managed punk rock bands, knocked up club waitress -- married her when kid was 2, now divorced (almost).
2. Appeals Court Judge -- 30 years older, set up by judge I clerked for -- my perfect man except he will probably be dead by our next date, if we even have a next date.

Recently at bat: Jewish Guy set up by my friend's mother. Went briefly to the University of Hartford , was a shoe salesman at Bloomies but is now focused on his new "career" as a real estate broker, lives with sister. Also, has only 1 drink a week, which incidentally I apparently wasn't worthy of.

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The Internet has also made an impact, according to Jane, a 36 year-old single mother of two:

2. I can tell you that dating now is much different than it was fifteen years ago. More people meet online than ever before. I've been doing that for a while now. I'm dating someone now that I've met online and we've been dating since mid-December. I think it's important for those that have to re-enter the dating world after being married and having children to know there's a whole new set of things to think about.

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There have been a number of what I would call "threatened male" emails, many of which came from the same source. Here's a sampling:

3. Is this a book about girls getting pregnant on purpose so
that a guy has to/is trapped into marrying them (like "Officer and a Gentleman")?

4. Oh boy- when is "Daddy is Trapped" coming out ?

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Regarding the inevitable decline of appearance when one is in a relationship:

5. On the "Are you in the Mommy Trap" question page: why does sex life and appearance have to improve since birth of child? Is it a matter of decline or maintaining the status quo? I think in most relationships, grooming habits and sex, invariably deteriorate regardless of whether people have children or not. So shouldn't the question be: have they sunk to levels you never thought possible?

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And finally, we are doing very well with the ten-and-under crowd on the North Shore of Long Island:

6. hi well im your niece tylers friend.. she told me this was her favorite website so i checked it out. i really think your book will be great and ill tell my mom to by it. have a great summer.

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Thank you all for your input and interest. Please continue to comment whenever you feel like it, in whatever form you like. All of the authors of the above messages have won Mommy Trap tee shirts, but we will not furnish their names for anonymity's sake. You know who you are, and especial kudos to our male entrant, who tried harder than everybody else, at least in terms of sheer volume.

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